There's a good blog post today on The Choice Blog at the New York Times website here. It's all about the etiquette of adding college admissions representatives as your friends on Facebook. The short answer is, DON'T DO IT, but this question bears a longer answer--namely, what is the best way to present yourself in the context of college admissions?
As many of you know, I'm an avid Facebook user. It's a great way to keep in touch with friends from high school and college and past jobs, and it's a nice way to be able to wish my friends a happy birthday or keep up with the latest milestones in their lives. What I like best, though, is how highly customizable Facebook's privacy features are. You can control who can search for you, how people interact with you online, and even the way that different friends can see your profile.
These highly customizable privacy settings help me control the information that I share with my Facebook friends, and they help protect my privacy from people who I don't want to interact with online, for whatever reason. If you were to search me right now on Facebook, you won't find me; I have my privacy settings set to make me unsearchable by people who are not currently my Facebook friends. This makes me feel protected from unsavory strangers, and it's also a nice policy to have professionally. No offense, but I won't be your Facebook friend while you're in high school: I'm your college counselor and I like all of you, but I'm not comfortable mixing my personal Facebook page with my professional life.
This last point is the one that most admissions officers are speaking to when they institute a "no friending" policy. Keep in mind that your college application process is like applying for a job: you're trying to make a good impression and represent yourself well so that you can move on to the next step in your academic life. If you visit a college campus and have a great conversation with an admissions representative or professor, the right choice is to send a thoughtful thank-you note via snail mail or email. Such communication preserves the tone that you're trying to project when you apply to college: you want to look thoughtful, diligent, and thorough. At best, this nice note might end up in your admission file to attest to the high quality of your character and your sincere interest in attending the school.
It's also okay to use email as a way to ask a question of an admissions representative, as long as you keep the email as professional as a written letter. For example, your email shouldn't look like this:
Subject: [no subject]
Hey,
I really liked visiting your school last weekend but i have another question can u let me know what kind of SAT scores i need to get in because i really want to go to your school
Sarah
I'm exaggerating a bit, of course, but make sure you have a coherent subject line, a proper salutation (like "Dear" or "Hi" rather than "Hey"), complete sentences, correct orthography, and a pleasant sign-off (like "Sincerely", "Regards", "Gratefully", "Thanks", or--my personal favorite--"Cheers"). So the preceding email should look more like this:
Subject: Visit to Campus on 9/18/09
Dear Mr. Smith,
It was a pleasure meeting you on your campus last week! I learned a lot and had a great time. I did have one more question when I got home that I was hoping you could answer. What kind of SAT scores do successful applicants to your school usually have? Thank you for your help and for a great visit!
Sincerely,
Sarah
Again, this kind of communication is professional, and it's always the right way to correspond with and communicate with admissions reps. If you're not comfortable writing such emails, never fear--just come to my office and I'll help you draft one of these. If you need to call an admissions office for any reason, come on by, too: I'm glad to help you make a script for your phone call.
The right choice isn't to friend an admissions representative on Facebook because, frankly, they're not your new friend: they're a person you met in a professional environment. Friending them on Facebook will not help your admission decision; at worst, it might negatively impact your admission decision, since you might come off as less than savvy, unserious, and a little childish. Plus, if the admission officer views your profile and there's anything less than sterling on it, that too could damage the impression you're trying to project.
This isn't to say that you shouldn't friend a student you meet on an overnight visit or students you meet when visiting a college. Rather, these students could be a great asset to you as you try to get a sense of the place you plan to attend. However, tread lightly here, too: you don't want to seem like the over-eager high school student who just friends everyone she's ever met.
In general, then, I think it's a really good policy to keep your Facebook life and your college application life as separate as possible. It's smart from a privacy perspective, and it's a safer way to protect the professional, put-together image you're trying to convey as an applicant.Continue Reading...
